Friday, December 8, 2017

Survivor Seasons Ranked 34th-1st

UPDATED after watching Survivor: Palau and Survivor: Guatemala.

I have been a bad Survivor fan.  I've procrastinated watching Survivor 10 and Survivor 11 for a VERY long time.  Way too long.  I finally watched them and am proud to say I've now watched every episode of Survivor and can finally do these rankings full justice.

34 seasons of Survivor have each been unique and have been highly talked about by fans.  Some are iconic, some are unforgettable and some are some of the best TV in history.  Here is a definitive ranking:

34th) Survivor: Redemption Island (winner: Rob "Boston Rob" Mariano) 


To me every episode of Survivor is enjoyable.  In fact only the episodes of Survivor: Borneo, season 1, were at all boring, but it is still fun to watch because it is the first. season. ever.  However, compared to a lot of other seasons, Redemption Island is a snooze fest.  It's premiere was decent, the "Rice Wars" episode was iconic, seeing Redemption Island for the first time was fun but other than that it was boring.  The casting was BAD, there were no real blindsides, Ometepe kept winning, the challenges were lame and it felt like the season was created to finally give Boston Rob a win.  However, what made this the worst season of Survivor in history is that from Day 1 the editing made it clear that Boston Rob would indeed win.  He practically got HALF the confessionals the whole season!  Add in the fact that Phillip Sheppard and Matt got a WHOLE bunch tons of people including end-gamers Natalie, Ashley and Grant got VERY little airtime.

33rd) Survivor: Fiji (winner: Earl Cole)

Unlike Redemption Island, Fiji had okay editing and was not rigged for a specific person to win.  However, Fiji did have THE WORST twist in Survivor history (Haves vs Have Nots which was more like Hotel and Restaurant vs Backpacking with no food) which meant that one tribe won ALL the pre-merge challenges, which led to a pagonging making for a boring pre-merge and post-merge!  In addition, the casting was lackluster except for Earl, Yau-Man and Dreamz and the entire Car Deal was so awkward that it was the last time there was ever a car reward, which is a real shame.  Yau-Man and his awesomeness save this season from being dead last.

32nd) Survivor: Panama (winner: Aras Baskauskas)

You may start noticing a theme here, but one of the reasons Panama is so low is the casting.  You truly need a good cast for a good Survivor season and Panama's cast was lackluster.  Cirie was gold, Terry was great, Shane was entertaining but everyone else including the winner Aras were pretty boring.  In addition, there were no real iconic moments from this season (oh wait, Shane's blackberry was iconic) and the editing was fairly poor.  The main storyline was Terry vs Aras which I never really got into.  The first Exile Island was fun (though I have never been a huge Exile fan) but overall it just does not compare to the seasons above it.


31st) Survivor: Tocantins (winner: JT Thomas)

I am almost certainly in the minority ranking Tocantins this low.  Somebody once put it pretty clearly: if you love Coach, you love Tocantins, if you hate Coach, you hate Tocantins.  Pre-South Pacific I more or less hated (well, strongly disliked), Coach.  That means that I dislike Tocantins because Tocantins was the Coach show.  Tyson was a A-hole in Tocantins too.   JT was fine but I have never been his biggest fan (and he is clearly not as good of a player as people make him out to be given his HvV AND now Game Changers performances) and I DO NOT get the Fishbach love.  Taj was awesome but she was one of the only bright spots this entire season.  Overall unforgettable.

30th) Survivor: Thailand (winner: Brian Heidik) 

Brian was a great winner and it was very entertaining to watch him on his "business trip".  Other than him the casting was terrible, the editing highlighted Brian's win from very early on, the culture did not have a nearly large enough influence for such an awesome location, and the entire Ted/Ghandia thing was one of the most awkward storylines in Survivor history.  Moving on.

29th) Survivor: Marquesas (winner: Vecepia Towery)

 To me there are several "groups" of seasons, and Thailand represents the end of the "worst" group and Marquesas is the beginning of the next group.  I have much less negative to say about Marquesas but still not too much positive to say.  The rise and fall of the Rotu 4 was one of the first power shifts in Survivor history, it was fun to watch Vecepia play a brilliant social game, Paschal and Neleh's bond was neat but overall it wasn't classic "awesome" Survivor.  ALL the religious influence in this season is what puts it on the bottom of its "group" of seasons.

28th) Survivor: The Australian Outback (winner: Tina Wesson)

Overall I for one find Australia similar to Marquesas.  It had a few more iconic moments (Skupin falling in the fire, Colby's immunity run, Colby's dumb move) but it had a bit too much Colby for me and not enough of the other players, especially given the (good) quality of what could have been a more evenly-edited cast.  With it only being season two Jeff was lackluster and the editing was rough which prevents it from climbing higher on this list.

27th) Survivor: Guatemala (winner: Danni Boatwright) 

Guatemala was an okay season with a decent cast (unfortunately, none of the newbies have returned) but overall it just felt like something was "missing".  Stephanie was fun to watch, but not as fun as in Palau.  The Judd and Jaime craziness is some of the most memorable content, and not for a good reason.  The hike through the jungle, the original hidden immunity idol, and a few fun strategic moments keep it this high, but overall it was very unforgettable.

26th) Survivor: San Juan del Sur (winner: Natalie Anderson)

I am a HUGE fan of the Blood vs Water theme but it definitely seems to work better with half returning players.  The return of Exile Island was disappointing after the success of Redemption in the first BvW season.  The editing was weird, not over-editing Natalie which was good but certainly under-editing Jaclyn and Missy and over-editing Jeremy.  Keeping it this high is Natalie.  She played  a very good and EXTREMELY entertaining game and made the last few episodes quite decent.

25th) Survivor: Borneo (winner: Richard Hatch)

As I mentioned the ONLY episodes of Survivor I find somewhat boring are some of the Borneo episodes.  It would be DEAD LAST if it wasn't the season that created the show we love.  I don't have much more to say about it, except that it is almost not a "typical" season.  To me it is more a "test run" season that had to be ranked somewhere.  This was arguably the hardest season to rank.  The case can be made that it must be first, because it is the first ever season or that it must be last because it is the most boring season ever.  In the end I put it 24th.  Moving on.

24th) Survivor: One World (winner: Kim Spradlin)

Although there is a fairly small jump, I do consider One World the start of the next "group" of seasons.  I consider myself a One World fan.  Well, not a FAN, but a fan.  Compared to other Survivor fans, that is.  One World is very often ranked in the "dreaded three" with Redemption Island and Fiji.  I cannot for the life of me understand why.  Yes, Kim's win was somewhat predictable and the challenges were somewhat lackluster but Chelsea, Sabrina and Troyzan were much better edited than any non-Rob people in Redemption Island and overall the editing was much more even.  The casting was average at worst and the One World twist was a great experiment that I wouldn't mind seeing again.  Overall a season I think of in positive light.

  23rd) Survivor: Caramoan (winner: John Cochran)

Caramoan is a very interesting season and represents the best and the worst of Survivor all at the same time.  Cochran was a fantastic winner that played a great game, was entertaining and easy to root for.  Watching him was some of the best TV possible therefore he obviously got a large edit.  Too large, however, as most of the other people were under-edited.  The casting to begin with was weak.  The fans (except for Laura, Michael and maybe a few others) were not fans and the favorites (except for Cochran, Malcolm, Brenda and Erik) were not favorites.  There were too many water challenges and camp life was often boring.  In addition to Cochran and his awesomeness the only other thing that brings this season up (and in a big way) is that the post-merge tribals were super entertaining with a string of great blindsides.

22nd) Survivor: Nicaragua (winner: Jud "Fabio" Birza)

Fabio is one of my favorite players ever and although I do not by any means consider him one of the best winners he was very entertaining and fun to watch.  Brenda was a fan-favorite as was Jane.  Marty was TV gold but Chase and Sash totally got on my nerves.  The double quit was a buzz killer but the unpredictability was good.  The editing was average.  This all results in an average season.

21st) Survivor: Samoa (winner: Natalie White)

Samoa is one of those seasons that could have been a very good season had the editing been better.  It's cast was certainly underrated but they all got very little airtime except for Russell and Shambo.  Russell and Shambo were so entertaining that I cannot possibly rank this season lower than this, despite bad challenges and bad editing.  A buzz killer at the end of the season though when Natalie beat Russell in one of the only wrong jury decisions in Survivor history.

20th) Survivor: All Stars (winner: Amber Brkich)

 All Stars was a fun season with all the twists and turns and of course it being the first returning player season in Survivor history.  The powerful duo of Romber that was bound to break at somepoint never did which was fascinating TV.  Bringing this season down is slightly below-average editing, all the controversy surrounding Sue's & Jenna's quits, Rob and Lex's fight, plus several tarnished legacies (Cesternino, Jenna, Sue, Colby).

19th) Survivor: Gabon (winner: Bob Crowley)

Gabon is a season that has been discussed in length with some people claiming it is the best ever and others claiming it as one of the worst.  To me I just don't get the Gabon love nor the Gabon hate.  It's just an average season of Survivor.  There is really no iconic moment associated with it and the cast was meh.  The unpredictability and all the tribe swaps keeps it this high.

18th) Survivor: Worlds Apart (winner: Mike Holloway)

Worlds Apart is definitely the start of the next "group" of seasons in my opinion.  I enjoyed it considerably more than Gabon and only slightly less than South Pacific.  Mike was a fantastic winner that was a joy to watch and overall the final 5 of that season was pretty strong (Mike, Carolyn, Will, Rodney and Sierra) with only Will playing a bad game.  The editing was quite decent, building up both Mike and Carolyn equally with enough attention to Rodney and Sierra that they both were considered winners candidates going into the finale.  The challenges were pretty good and there was some fun strategy.  Oh and the cast?  Killer.  Jenn and Shirin didn't last all that long but were SO MEMORABLE.  The only real thing bringing this down (and fairly far down) is all the negative attention/bullying surrounding this season with Dan, Will, Rodney, Shirin and Sierra.

17th) Survivor: South Pacific (winner: Sophie Clarke)

I may be one of the only Survivor fans on the planet to rank South Pacific halfway through the rankings but it bewilders me why so many people HATE it.  To me it is hands down the most underrated season in Survivor history.  The editing was great, cast quite decent, pre-merge even and fun and Ozzy sending himself to Redemption was so much fun to watch.  Cochran's flip and the pagonging does bring it down but not to the BOTTOM!  Slightly better than average is the worst I can possibly rank South Pacific.  In fact just writing this makes me want to rewatch it!


16th) Survivor: Africa (winner: Ethan Zohn)

We are now really in the stretch of seasons that are pretty darn good and that I would never get tired of rewatching.  Survivor: Africa is definitely SOLID Survivor!  Ethan may not be the best winner but Lex, Kathy, Little Kim, Big Tom, Goldsmith and so many others make this cast one of the better ones.  All the attention on the location was awesome and some underrated strategy took place.  GOOD SEASON!

15th) Survivor: Millennials vs Gen X (winner: Adam Klein)

Millennials vs Gen X started with a BANG when both tribes had to evacuate on Day 2 for the first time in Survivor history, due to a cyclone.  The second episode was awesome with all the excitement surrounding the Mari #blindside.  However, most of the pre-merge was dull and predictable, saved only by one player (Michaela) and great challenges.  However, the post-merge was nothing but excitement with blindside after blindside including the 3rd ever rock draw which led to one of the leading threats to win being eliminated.  Also, the editing was very good with Adam's win not becoming obvious until David was voted out and not even being considered until Episode 11 or 12.  All things told, most definitely a solid season.  Would be higher if the pre-merge had been more entertaining and if the cast had been somewhat more dynamic as a whole.

14th) Survivor: Palau (winner: Tom Westman)

Palau was a very fun and memorable season.  The entire disaster that was Ulong would not be fun to watch every season but for one season it was extremely memorable and fantastic.  Stephanie was nothing but gold this season and the entire end game gave us lots of people to root for.  Tom's win was impressive and the challenges were great (Ba Ba Buoy, oh yeah!).  Would be even higher if the editing had been better (Tom's win was WAY too predictable) and if there had been more strategic moments.

13th) Survivor: The Amazon (winner: Jenna Morasca)

The Amazon really represents so much of what we love about Survivor from Cesternino's brilliant strategy, the Jaburu girls and their drama (who could forget THAT peanut butter moment?), Deena and Christy's gold TV moments, the men vs women theme, some awesome challenges and great editing.  There is hardly anything bad to say about this season but in the end 12 others edged it out.

12th) Survivor: Vanuatu (winner: Chris Daughtery)

 This is another season that I probably rank slightly higher than most Survivor fans and I am also in the minority preferring it to The Amazon.  The opening ceremony was epic, the men vs women battle was just as evident as it was in the first season, the cast was awesome, the all girls alliance dominating and then crumbling coupled with Chris' amazing come from behind victory was just gold.  It just is not as AMAZING as the Top 10 but it is certainly Survivor in all its glory.

11th) Survivor: Philippines (winner: Denise Stapley)

The start of the third-to-last "group" of seasons starts with the Philippines.  After a string of seasons (Nicaragua, Redemption Island, South Pacific, One World)  that were mostly below average Philippines is truly the season that "saved" Survivor.  Denise was an awesome winner, the editing was perfect, the disaster that was Matsing was entertaining and the cast was killer.  Definitely a legendary season of Survivor that deserves to be in the Top 10 but Game Changers just pushed it out.

10th) Survivor: China (winner: Todd Herzog)

China was an extremely entertaining season worth a re-watch any day.   The editing and especially casting were some of the best in Survivor history, watching Courtney's underdog storyline unfold was fantastic, James made his first appearance on Survivor and delivered including THAT double idol vote out and all the cultural reference was nothing short of fantastic.

9th) Survivor: Kaoh Rong (winner: Michele Fitzgerald)

People can scream "recency bias!" all they want but I truly believe that Kaoh Rong is an all-around AWESOME season.  Throughout the season Kaoh Rong seemed similar to San Juan del Sur with power shifts at similar times, a similar merge and an under-the-radar female winner.  However, if San Juan del Sur came from hell Kaoh Rong came from heaven.  The cast was SPOT ON, editing much more even, better challenges and more unpredictability.  A few years down the road I think we will still be talking about Kaoh Rong in very high regard.

8th) Survivor: Pearl Islands (winner: Sandra Diaz-Twine) 

Survivor fans often differ in terms of opinion of how good a season is but MOST fans can agree Pearl Islands is a VERY good season.  The pirate theme was so intriguing, the cast was amazing (Rupert, Sandra and Fairplay, need I say more?), the dead grandma lie was so iconic, the editing was great and the challenges were some of the best in Survivor history.  So, so, so good.

7th) Survivor: Cook Islands (winner: Yul Kwon)

Cook Islands is right up there with South Pacific for me as the most underrated season in Survivor history.  It gets a bad rap for the racial divide twist but for me that was not a bad thing.  If that is seen as racist, why aren't men vs women seasons seen as sexist?  Doesn't make sense to me.  And that only lasted for TWO episodes anyway!  EVERYTHING about this season was amazing.  The casting (it gave birth to five legends!: Parvati, Penner, Ozzy, Yul and Candice), the comeback of the Aitu 4, the mutiny, and of course the Billy and Candice moment.  #MoreLoveForTheCooks

6th) Survivor: Cagayan (winner: Tony Vlachos)

Cagayan is in my opinion the beginning of the semi-final "group" of seasons--the true legends.  It also receives the distinct honor as the best all-newbie season in Survivor history.  The cast was probably the best all-newbie cast ever, the editing was amazing, the challenges weren't great but also not bad but the unpredictability yet defined and compelling strategy made for a truly fantastic season.  Tony is one of the best winners ever.  It also has already given birth to six returnees including the best winner in Survivor history, and there are several more (LJ, Jefra, Jeremiah, Trish) that would be great returnees.

5th) Survivor: Heroes vs Villains (winner: Sandra Diaz-Twine)

Very often considered the best season ever, Heroes vs Villains is certainly a Survivor gem.  The cast is one of the best ever, the game play is hard to beat (Parvati's double idol play MAY be my favorite moment in Survivor history) and of course we had our first ever two-time winner (though it should have been a different person, but that's another story).  Would be even higher if the strategy and editing had been more well defined (it just felt "jumpy" at times).
 
4th) Survivor: Micronesia (winner: Parvati Shallow)

Micronesia's cast, like Cambodia, was FULL of people there to PLAY the game.  The final 4 Black Widow Brigade members (Parvati, Amanda, Cirie and Natalie) almost certainly comprise the best final four ever.  The string of Ozzy/Jason/Erik blindsides was amazing and the pre-merge is certainly underrated.  It was the best season ever for a long time but then came:

3rd) Survivor: Blood vs Water (winner: Tyson Apostol) 

When Heroes vs Villains did not trump Micronesia and then we had that string of bad seasons many fans were starting to believe that Micronesia would forever hold the title of best season ever and that Survivor would never return to it's glory days.  Well then came along Season 27, Blood vs Water.  To me it became the best season in history.  The loved ones twist was so refreshing, Redemption Island redeemed itself, the cast was amazing (Ciera is my all-time favorite Survivor player) and we had someone vote their mom out.   Oh yeah, there was a freakin' rock draw too!  Truly a season to be remembered for a long, long, long time.

2nd) Survivor: Cambodia (winner: Jeremy Collins)

Blood vs Water did not hold its title for too long because along came Survivor: Cambodia--Second Chance.  Because the fans voted the castaways in they felt the need to PLAY hard not only for themselves and their family but for America.  Every single person came to play their own game.  We had two tribes become three tribes.  We had a record number of tribe swaps.  We had one of the harshest seasons in terms of conditions.  And through it all the season gave birth to "voting blocs" which will forever change the way Survivor is played.  A true icon.

1st) Survivor: Game Changers (winner: Sarah Lacina)

I'd always considered the five seasons of Cagayan, HvV, Micronesia, BvW and Cambodia to be the "final group" of season, the true legends, all so good that they're hard to rank.  Well along came Survivor: Game Changers, our most recent season, and from close to the beginning I knew it would be in that "final group" but by the end of the season it was clear that it was truly in a league of its own.  People can scream "RECENCY BIAS!" when they read this but I truly did not know Survivor could get this good, and it absolutely deserves this spot.  There were twists and turns at every corner, voting blocs were deployed once again, and we watched the best single game in Survivor history getting played before our eyes.  There were a record number of twists, which is sometimes a good thing and sometimes not, but these all worked to perfection.  The double-tribe tribal was so epic that it must happen at least once every season from here on out, IMO.  The luxurious exile was brilliant and I want to see it again.  The new final tribal format was SO MUCH BETTER and fairer, and YES, I NEED to see it again!  Queen Sandra also cemented her legacy as best player in Survivor history, as did Cirie hers as the best to never win.  There were redeemed legacies in Sierra and Culpepper.  Some people sight the Final 14 Tribal Council as something that heavily "taints" the season but to me it ended up being a beautiful thing and added a little bit of cultural relevance in a season that otherwise lacked it.  It only made the season better.  And then on top of it all there was that legendary Final 6 tribal where Cirie was eliminated in historic fashion.  The only negative thing I have to say about this season is that Sarah's edit was a bit too strong for most of the season but most people got "enough" air time including runner-up Culpepper who got a large enough edit to make us still wonder at least a little bit going into the vote reveal.  Overall, it truly is way better than I ever thought possible!

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